I heard a woman who rescues dogs say, “I eat, sleep and breathe rescue.” Oh, that Christians would say the same of lost and dying souls!
I am 61 years old now and my aim each day is to keep the two commandments of Jesus Christ: to love God with all my heart and soul and mind, and to love my neighbors as I love myself. “And he [Jesus] said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the great and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. “ (Matthew 22:37-39).
This keeps me quite busy!
Neighbors are not always easy to love. My neighbors are disabled, unhappy, poor, irritable, mentally ill, grim, hopeless, nosey, smokers, gamblers, alcoholics, drug dealers.
I told God I didn’t love them, that I didn’t even like them. I asked God to help me abide in Him and to abide in me. I asked God to love these difficult people through me. I began praying earnestly for them—and God changed my attitude! I truly love each one of them now. I have an option to move out of here, but I am choosing to stay. God planted me here for a purpose.
I aim to study God’s word three hours a day, to pray at least six times a day, do at least one hour of intercessory prayer, and minister to the spiritual needs of the 230 disabled and elderly people who live here in this public housing project. I often don’t live up to that, but it is the daily rhythm for which I reach.
With the difficulties of advancing age, I find it more difficult to find the balance between time spent loving God and time spent loving others. Indeed, I find it difficult to simply make it through painful days. It is harder and harder to find the time to balance my relationship with God and loving service to my neighbors.
Prayer is what gives me the balance. I follow a schedule of daily prayers, a litany of the hours if you will, that gives rhythm to these days when retirement and constant physical pain would make it appealing to languish in doing nothing at all. “16 But I call to God, and the Lord will save me. 17 Evening and morning and at noon I utter my complaint and moan, and he hears my voice.” (Psalm 55:17)
I wake with prayers of gratitude. “O Lord, in the morning you hear my voice; in the morning I prepare a sacrifice for you and watch.” (Psalm 5:1)
I sing as I go about my morning tasks following the advice of Psalm 100:
“Make a joyful noise to the Lord, all the earth!
2 Serve the Lord with gladness!
Come into his presence with singing!
3 Know that the Lord, he is God! It is he who made us, and we are his;
we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
4
xEnter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise!
Give thanks to him; bless his name!
5 For the Lord is good;
his steadfast love endures forever,
and his faithfulness to all generations.”
Throughout the day I continue singing, “psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with [my] heart” (Ephesians 5:19).
At 9:00 a.m. I give my workday to the Lord. Moses said, “Hereby you shall know that the Lord has sent me to do all these works, and that it has not been of my own accord.” (Numbers 16:28) So I ask God to make my works not things of my own accord, of my own mind, but to let my daily work be according to God’s will. I ask to be able to bear up with physical pain and for sufficient strength to do my daily work.
At noon I pause in the heat of the work day to ask God to help me persevere, “praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end [keeping] alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints, 19 and also for me, that words may be given to me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel, 20 for which I am an ambassador . . ” (Ephesians 6:18-20).
At 3:00 in the afternoon I remember his death, and give thanks. I recall how insufficient the blood of bulls and goats was, how necessary and gracious His great love and sacrifice was for us who were lost in sin. ““Sacrifices and offerings you have not desired, but a body have you prepared for me; 6 in burnt offerings and sin offerings you have taken no pleasure. Then I said, ‘Behold, I have come to do your will, O God, as it is written of me in the scroll of the book.’ ” (Hebrews 10:5-7)
At 6:00, I recall the lengthening of shadows, the brevity of life, and pray for wisdom to make the best use of my time. “15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because
qthe days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15-16) I volunteer my evening time to a Christian coffee house where there are often unbelievers. I ask God to help me “[w]alk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of [my] time. 6 [lettimg my] speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that [I] may know how you ought to answer each person.” (based on Ephesians 4:5-6).
At 9:00 I pray evening prayers with friends, which include intercessions. Because the interecession of Christ never ceases, I bring to Him by prayer those people I know who are hurting and need His salvation, comfort, provision, protection, and care.
Before I go to bed, I pray night prayers, including prayers for a restful night and a peaceful death. I recall Psalm 17, a psalm of David:
1 Hear a just cause, O Lord; attend to my cry!
Give ear to my prayer from lips free of deceit!
2 From your presence let my vindication come!
Let your eyes behold the right!
3 You have tried my heart, you have visited me by night,
you have tested me, and you will find nothing;
I have purposed that my mouth will not transgress.
4 With regard to the works of man, by the word of your lips
I have avoided the ways of the violent.
5 My steps have held fast to your paths;
my feet have not slipped.
6 I call upon you, for you will answer me, O God;
incline your ear to me; hear my words.
7 Wondrously show your steadfast love,
O Savior of those who seek refuge
from their adversaries at your right hand.
8 Keep me as the apple of your eye;
hide me in the shadow of your wings,
9 from the wicked who do me violence,
my deadly enemies who surround me.
10 They close their hearts to pity;
with their mouths they speak arrogantly.
11 They have now surrounded our steps;
they set their eyes to cast us to the ground.
12 He is like a lion eager to tear,
as a young lion lurking in ambush.
13 Arise, O Lord! Confront him, subdue him!
Deliver my soul from the wicked by your sword,
14 from men by your hand, O Lord,
from men of the world whose portion is in this life.
You fill their womb with treasure;
they are satisfied with children,
and they leave their abundance to their infants.
15 As for me, I shall behold your face in righteousness;
when I awake, I shall be satisfied with your likeness.
This rhythm of praying the litany of the hours helps me deal with the constant pressure of chaplaincy work. Often people call or knock at my door for prayer, and as soon as I step into the hallway I encounter a mass of human need. Before I awake and during my sleep, the phone rings with another human need. At times, it is overwhelming. I know it was like that for Jesus, too. Caring for others is draining. Jesus even said that he could feel virtue going out of him as he healed. (Luke 8:46)
Jesus sought quiet gardens where he could pray. John 18:1 speaks of a garden across the Kidron Valley that Jesus and his disciples entered. Matthew 14:23 tells us that “. . . after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up on the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone . . .” Jesus did not flee from lonely places as we do in furious pursuits of pleasure to try to heal our loneliness. No, Jesus fled to lonely places to find sweet communion with His Father.
I have found a patio that no one uses here in the housing project, just fenced in concrete, but I have added a few pots of herbs, vegetables, and flowers. It has become my place of refreshing, a place where I can look up at the high rise apartment and pray for the people there, a place where I can be alone with God.
So in my own personal life, I have found that prayer is the way to find balance between loving and serving God and loving and serving others.
